Stand Against the Bully

A principal duty common to all individuals a school district’s learning community would be to protect students against failure. Central for this duty is that carry out whatever we can as educators to “remove obstacles to learning.” Yet one of these simple obstacles to learning could be the social barriers some students face each day right here in our very schools. Within a recent climate survey (April 2012) conducted among my school district’s parents and community members, 70% of respondents reported that “there is a dilemma with bullying within our schools.” Nationwide, nearly one in three students are involved in bullying as whether victim or perpetrator; close to nine in ten students are going to complete bullying incidents once you include the student being a bystander.

cyber bullying
Boys are more likely to bully than girls; however, boys and girls are often bullied in another way. As a social phenomenon, the regularity of acts of bullying in schools gradually increases throughout the elementary years, surges significantly in the centre school years, then tapers off when students reach high school. Bullying happens to most kids at least once during their schooling experience. Boys tend to be more physically aggressive toward their victims than girls; however, girls are given to use the more emotionally intimidating technique of spreading rumors. In the school setting, bullies try to find easy targets like students who are quiet, sensitive, or who jump out in some way as “different.” All bullies utilize the weapon of “social exclusion” as a method to isolate their victims.

The most typical response to being bullied is always to suffer in silence. For approximately 15% of students, bullying can make an otherwise productive school year into one that’s miserable and packed with torment. The good news is that my school district, along with other school districts across the nation, are taking a stand contrary to the bully. Systematic and intentional anti-bullying programs have proved highly successful in recent years. I use the word intentional to get a reason: part of the downside to bullying is that historically folks have been extremely unintentional (or unthinking) with regards to dealing with a bully. Many of us have been guilty of being passive bystanders amid a bully – at the same time adults – simply because we are unsure how you can react or do not know exactly how to get involved. It will take a change in culture to intentionally eliminate bullying, and it is fairly easy to do for one reason: in most cases, the victim as well as the bystanders greatly outnumber the bully. This document will provide the reader with some basic anti-bullying techniques that supply effective remedies on the various types of bullying. Present with all of these remedies, however, could be the adoption of a social contract to produce zero tolerance of behaviors that do not support the dignity and self-determination of others.

Bullies will often be individuals who choose to reject common standards of civility to experience power-power over others and power over self, characterized by a self-centered want to stay in control at all costs. Bullying is intentional. It is finished through a conscious option to cause harm. Bullies often enjoy making people suffer. They’ve got little or no compassion for anyone they target, and they often defend their actions by blaming the victim — “So-and-so taught me to be do it!” Group bullying can also occur and propagate from a single bully source, web-sites joining in the spectacle. Bullies create an insidious situation in a social environment since they model a workable technique for “getting your way.” Without intervention, others may turn to imitate bullying behavior as a method of having their own wants and needs met. The bully’s primary tools, may it be physical or emotional bullying, is fear and intimidation.

Because bullying is centered on power, the best way to stand against a bully is additionally through the use of power. Enter the bystander into the bullying scenario. Bystanders are those people who are neither the bully nor the victim, but you are involved in most bullying incidents even though they stand by and do nothing at all. Fortunately, it is the victim and bystanders who hold a formidable amount of power in almost any incident-if they choose to exercise this power-through the sheer weight of numbers. Any group, anywhere, can shift the imbalance of power enjoyed with the bully simply by having victims and bystanders join together. All of that need occur in these situations may be the insistence on civility, which the bully can be redirected into supporting. The victim/bystander alliance will forever form an effective counterforce against bullying in general. Like matter and anti-matter; the 2 forces cancel the other person out. And in social situations, what’s left from this collision is certainly one important thing: Civility. Each state of civility has become achieved, anything is possible in improving the culture we are in.

Bullying is Seen Across All Grade Levels

Bullying usually starts in pre-school. Small children want to be the center of attention, then one way to accomplish this goal is thru bullying. Showing off, demonstrating physical prowess, forcing another child to stop something that is wanted (toys, clothing, trampoline game), and name calling are tactics used by the pre-school bully. In Kindergarten, students learn to use exclusion to intimidate others. Extremely common to hear things like “You’re not my friend, so you can’t enjoy me.” From the elementary grades, the bully gets more sophisticated by leading a small grouping of other students (a clique) to help you administer cruelty to other people. Bullying by adolescents is where things can really get serious, especially in the junior high years. The pressure from peers to “fit in” causes pre-teens and youths to go along with the crowd, even if that requires them to engage in bullying behavior as a method to gain acceptance in a group. A student who will not belong to no less than one social group are at greater risk of being teased frequently. However, once peer groups have formed, many bullying behaviors go away. As I mentioned earlier, things have a tendency to get better for the student that has been bullied if they enter high school. The social status from the bully diminishes as kids become adults. Students at this age have an overabundance of cognitive resources to create to bear in determining from the comfort of wrong, and typically develop a moral code of conduct to call home by. Actually, the recognition of the bully usually tops out around age 14-15. For the reason that their peers start to recognize the havoc the bully causes with an otherwise smoothly operating social milieu.

Cyber bullying is the new twist by using an old theme. The cyber bully has one distinct advantage on his reality-based counterpart: anonymity. Cyber bullying is described as: “threatening, lying about, stalking you aren’t harassing a person online or via other electronic communication device.” Many people think that cyber bullying cannot be that bad. Actually, it can be much, much worse than bullying in person. The reason for this is the bullying is relentless given it can happen 24/7 and wherever the victim actually is. The cyber bullying victim has no place to hide. The tactics utilized by the cyber bully include: sending harassing messages, impersonating an associate in order to gain trust, posting personal data, posting false and unflattering information, posting private or doctored pictures, and taking advantage of the Internet to encourage others to participate the bullying.